Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Red Angry's Rant: Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2

Modern Gayfare, Call of Dodo, or a slew of many other puns for the game title broke record sales last year. I had my fare share of alone time with this mega title and for the most part I've had a great time: whether it be in the compelling single player campaign or the additive online multilayer, to the special co-op missions; there's a lot to love about this shooter.

Now that I've gotten that out of the way, it's time to break this puppy down li
ke Britney Spears in her last psychotic episode. I have no hate towards the campaign, it's just awesome; with some great plot twits and an ending that channels Halo 2's controller-flinging conclusion; it's worth the 60 bucks alone. So....

On to the rant. Online play, where to begin... I guess I'll start with the most broken, gut wrenching, chest grabbing, putrid, unbalanced excuse for a game play mechanic; the M203 Grenade Launcher, better know as the noob tube. Back in Modern Warfare 1, the vast majority of player that I'd talk to thought it should never have be included in the game. It's just too easy to get a kill with. It wasn't too terrible though because the most shots you could ever carry was 3. In MW2, any balance to this feature went flying out of the window and somehow landed on th far-side of the moon.

With great perks, come great possibilities..... for retarded, fossilized dog feces to be slapped together and called an online FPS. MW2 lets you have not 1, but 2 ways to have easy, camper-friendly infinite ammo. So, where in MW1, you had a max of 3 guaranteed kills, it's now possible to achieve over a hundred; and I know because I've done it.

There's nothing like going 11 and 0 only to have it end by some guy randomly firing tubes on the map. I really could type out days worth of text to explain just how teeth clenching noob tubes are but who gives a bell end. Moving on.

This game has one of the worst spawning systems I've seen in any game, for God sakes, Golden Eye on the 64 had a system that makes MW2 look like that one guy in every group of friends that no one likes and the only reason you keep him around is to make fun of him. One great example is when you manage to snag a chopper-gunner and begin to rain death upon the unlucky enemy team as they spawn over and over in the same corner, not even being able to take one step. I dare you to go to you tube right now and search for chopper gunner ownage if you don't believe me.

There's a ton of brokenness in this game; over powered weapons, joining a losing game with only 3 seconds left, poor skill based matchmaking, game effecting glitches, bad host migration (when it works), and a party system that doesn't allow you to control the party, just to name a few.

I do enjoy online a good bit, but there is so much that erks me that just can't be ignored. On the rage meter, MW2 score around 75% (as in, I'm a fit of uncontrollable roid rage 75% of the time playing the game.)

If you're anything like me or you have a short temper for unbalanced game play, you might wanna skip over this title, or at least only rent it. But if you're into the whole camper-loving, no-scopeing, spawn killing, noob tube fest; then you might be able to keep your shinny new controller from flying into you're HD flat-screen. Peace Bitches.....

1 comment:

  1. Finally someone stood up against MW2, some people think that God shit it out himself/herself/itself.